Shame!

The word carries with it so many uncomfortable emotions. I can almost feel myself slumping down into myself, trying to make myself as small as possible. It makes me want to be invisible.

I speak to many clients that have suffered sexual abuse. What they all seem to be doing is carrying the heavy burden of shame. Along with shame, guilt comes hand in hand. They feel as if they somehow where responsible for the assault.

"I must have done something to encourage it"

"I should have spoken out"

"I should have fought"

They may not see that they were doing their best to survive and that there is nothing that they would have done to deserve this violation. They were manipulated and brainwashed. Silenced by fear for themselves or silenced to protect someone else. Silenced by shame and guilt.

Over time their pain can turn in on themselves and it eats away at their self worth.

They feel worthless, they feel ugly, they feel as if something is broken, they feel ashamed.

As well as dealing with the emotional effects of the trauma more than likely they are living with some other of the effects of Trauma such as:

Flashbacks

Memory gaps

Anger

Stress

Anxiety

Depression

Panic attacks

Hypervigilance

Numbing

Part of my role as a counsellor is to help them to see that they do not need to feel shame. Through therapy their trauma is processed and they can begin to heal. They can start to see....

They were not in any way to blame.

They do not need to carry this heavy burden of guilt. They can hold their heads up high.

They are strong amazing people

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If you would like some help to work through a past trauma fill out my contact form or email me on lavenderlanecounselling@gmail.com

#trauma #childhoodtrauma #healingfromtrauma